Enjoying one more profession resurgence with worldwide hit single Padam Padam, Kylie Minogue is outwardly additionally among the many massive identify acts lining as much as headline the AFL Grand Final leisure.
Melbourne’s most well-known pop product can be a terrific match for that at some point in September, particularly now that Crowded House have pulled out.
With that in thoughts, right here’s each AFL membership so as of the present ladder as a Kylie music.
COLLINGWOOD
Get Outta My Way. The membership you like to hate are steamrolling the competitors in season 2023. It’s laborious to see anybody else lifting the Premiership Cup on September 30. There, I hope that places the mockers on ‘em.
MELBOURNE
Despite clinging to the top four (thanks to a soft fixture), the 2021 Premiers don’t appear the dominant drive of two years in the past. That stated, they’re discovering type on the proper finish of the season. So, come on, Melbourne — Confide In Me — how deep will you go in September?
BRISBANE LIONS
Your Disco Needs You. This one goes out to Joe Daniher, the gun ahead who left Essendon to place the icing on the cake for Brissie. Big Joe will get silver service from the most effective midfields within the recreation however solely manages mediocre returns. Get on the dance flooring, mate.
PORT ADELAIDE
Many AFL pundits have already been Shocked by the ability. Most had them outdoors the eight, however even people who had Port enjoying finals didn’t suppose they’d be difficult the Pies, Dees and Lions for prime spot.
CARLTON
Did It Again. With top-end expertise delivering bottom-dwelling outcomes for the previous few years, the Blues appeared destined to overlook one more September. Somehow they’ve surged into finals rivalry … however there’s nonetheless time to bomb out.
WESTERN BULLDOGS
Spinning Around. After two massive losses to open the season, coach Luke Beveridge threw gamers round and acquired the Doggies again on observe — for some time. The membership previously referred to as Footscray are among the many groups that hope to play finals however can’t string collectively a couple of wins.
ST KILDA
It’s gotta be Step Back in Time. The return this 12 months of Ross “The Boss” Lyon as head coach after he left the Saints flapping within the wind to defect to Fremantle in 2012 was bewildering. But it appears to have labored, with the Saints shaping as much as play finals.
GWS GIANTS
Love at First Sight. Love, and hate. Toby Greene is essentially the most entertaining, and annoying, participant within the AFL. Four years on from their Grand Final debut, can Greater Western Sydney push into September?
GEELONG CATS
Got to Be Certain. With 13 gamers aged 30 or older on their checklist, it appears Geelong’s mature brigade aren’t placing their ft up till they’ve squeezed each final Premiership out of their group.
SYDNEY SWANS
Especially for You. Suffering from a hangover after shedding the 2022 Grand Final, the Swans have been struggling to discover a function in 2023. That was till Buddy Franklin introduced his retirement, now the remainder of the season could be a massive send-off for one of many best full forwards of all-time.
ADELAIDE CROWS
Despite the off-field racism controversy, Adelaide sharp-shooter Taylor “Tex” Walker has acquired his goal-kickin’ boots on. He’s solely behind Carlton’s Charlie Curnow for the Coleman Medal in true, ahem, Cowboy Style.
ESSENDON
The Loco-Motion. Everybody’s doing a model new dance now below new coach Brad Scott. While nonetheless usually inconsistent, there are good indicators at Bomberland. As a fan, their different music is I Believe in You, launched in 2004 — the identical 12 months Essendon final gained a last.
RICHMOND
Can’t Get You Out of My Head. We hate to confess it, however the Tigers have the catchiest membership music in all the AFL. We gained’t be listening to it on the Grand Final this 12 months.
GOLD COAST SUNS
Can any soccer supporter put your Hand On Your Heart and inform me why the Suns needs to be within the AFL when a proud soccer state like Tasmania has needed to wait so lengthy? The $25 million in AFL funding Gold Coast receives is the equal most within the comp.
FREMANTLE
Slow. Since becoming a member of the AFL in 1995, the Dockers have tried to defer all success to their crosstown rivals. Even with the Eagles circling the bowl in 2023 and Freo having a promising crew, they nonetheless refuse to embrace alternative.
HAWTHORN
With the youngest squad within the AFL and apparently in rebuild mode, the struggling Hawks get Kids — Kylie’s duet with 2022 Grand Final entertainer Robbie Williams.
NORTH MELBOURNE
Between a coach stepping away and a rebuild slower than the Roe Street roadworks, you’ll should excuse my French however Je Ne Sais Pas Pourquoi the perennially underperforming Roos trouble.
WEST COAST EAGLES
Too simple. Better The Devil You Know. As the historically high-flying WA franchise finds new barrels to scrape by way of, outsiders are scratching their heads as to how, or why, they’ll cling onto coach Adam Simpson, chief govt Trevor Nisbett and their prime brass.
Source: www.perthnow.com.au
